Whimsical Thoughts

• The problems of the Jewish people are because we did not say au revoir to the erev rav. april 2006
• After six years a new car should be retired. april 2006
• The tree doesn't fall far from the egg. (just silly) april 2006
• Prostitutes would never get paid if it weren't for their unions. July 2006
• Some men are egotestical. March 2008
• When he runs, my dog has pants. December 2007
• Name for cook in greasy spoon restaurant: Iphraim. Feb 2008
• Name for boy with cronic earaches: Meir Hertz. Feb 2008
• The fastest land animal always wins races because he is a cheata'. Dec 2007
• When the Huns retreated from the West, some were left behind because they had stopped to take a leak. When they called to their bretheren to wait for them, the Huns replied, "We're goin', you're peein'." Henceforth they were called the Europeans. March 2008
• What do call a bad noodle pudding? Lukshon Hora. 18March2008
• Why was an extra day need to kill enemies in Shushan? Because some of the enemies where off having their shoes-shined.
• How do we know Achoshverash was a woman? Because he is the sister of Veresh (Achos Veresh). This also proves he was Ashkenazi.
• What do you call a bug that the programmer tells you is a feature? a Beature (rhymes with pitcher). march 2008
• How did Adam keep the fig leaf in place? He conFigured it . April 2008
• How did Yuri Gagarin get to be the first man to orbit the Earth? Because he was Rushin. April 2008
• Never call an apple torte an apple cake, you might be misconstrudeled. 7 May 2008
• What's the name of Mr Take's illegitimate daughter? Miss Take.
• If you drink a banana, the banana will be drunk.
• To commemorate the Arab's rejection of the UN partition plan, they named a city after the rejection: UM el Fahkem.
• ein twe spring in de zee, drie, fier, ik heb geen bier five ses, ik slag you mit mein mees, zeven oct, ik heft ji en pox.
• Someone who like walking: pedophile.
• Prayer for less endowed man: tefilla leshalosh raglayim. 8 jun 2008
• A Jewish hacker from the 1970's: Alter hacker. 8 jun 2008
• A Talush Maskoret that got lost: Talush LaTrek.
• Why did the drunk stop in the middle of thowing up? Other things came up. Feb 2009
• When a Turkish carpet salesman tries to persuade you that the carpet he is selling is antique, you know it is a load of Istambull. Feb 2009
• A farmer should put his seeds in his mouth if he really wants to suckseed. Feb 2009
• What do call a dumb person who gets into Oxford University? An oxymoron.
• What did the hermit crab say when he left home? I shell return. April 2009
• Which of the prophets was the best fed? Hava cook. April 2009
• A monkey was arrested for stealing bananas. Now he is appealing.
• Judaism isn't sexist. All 7 of the prophetesses were female. April 2009
• The whale died of starvation because he was beyond kelp. 16 May 2009
• I find lemon rinds appealing. Jan 2010
• The writings of one of the Apostles is a Paulling. jan 2010
• Why did the man who did not like celery in his soup drop the soup from a great height? He wanted to ex-celerate it. Jun 2010
• Cleaning a toilet is not always fecable. Oct 2010
• IP Conflict: Two men vying for the toilet. Jan 2011
• He connected the network card just in the NIC of time. Feb 2011
• When is a ph not a ph? When it's a diphthong. Mishap feb 2011
• What are the [analogous] anomalous anonymous anemones phenomenon? Mar 2011
• non-sensence: anomalous anonymous anemones phenomenon
• Either pay attention or pay the teacher! may 2011
• At a urinal one should read European litterature. May 2011
• It is a very unusual word that has three u's. June 2012
• When the street cleaner came near the Mayor's driveway, the Mayor asked him, 'Please wipe my asphalt'. Dec 2013